Wednesday, 29 September 2010

it's one of these days

It's about love again. A popular theme, I see. But I'm not going to talk about things I love. I'm going to talk how I can't forget what I've loved. Silly me, I just can't. It started already years ago. I was young, so young and the boy was much older than me. I was sure that it'd never work and so it didn't. But there was something I couldn't resist in him. Was it his smile or hair, the way he is, talk or walk? I don't know. It could be everything, all the little details or otherwise...none of them.

What if it was only in my head? I saw him as a man of my dreams but in reality, he can be totally different. However, I was helplessly in love. And to be honest I still am. Not so passionately, not that much that I'd only think about him. Still there are these days when I'm absent-minded and you find me boring and slow. It's because he still keeps coming to my dreams every once in a while. Last night, twice.

Now we're both older and the age difference isn't so big anymore. Or so it feels. But am I ready to just call him or talk to him if I'd see him suddenly somewhere on a Friday night? No, no I'm not. When it's about boys I turn out to be shy and insecure. My head certanly forgets how to be funny and produce sensible sentences. I really need to get rid of this because it's not who I am. I'm the person who calls to taxi when no one else got guts to do it. I take challenges and I'm not scared of anything but jumping to water. If you know me you know that I like to talk with others, even they'd been strangers.

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